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Ifig loved her morning routine.
Wake up, drag her wife back into bed, cuddle, get up, eat breakfast, talk with Baud about everything and nothing, sit outside and enjoy the cool breeze through their little patch of summer in the woods.
Life had been good for the last few weeks. Not perfect, but Ifig didn't trust perfect anyway. Too much could hide behind perfect. With good, all the cracks were out in the open for anyone to see and fill with glittering gold.
Baud was...well, Baud. She had made progress since the seasons changed, yes, but she wasn't completely comfortable talking about her feelings yet, and Ifig didn't expect her to be. Some days, she was almost as chipper as she was when Maritte and Pertisia visited; other days, she locked herself in a room and barely spoke, only eating if Ifig made a sustained effort to get her to.
Today was somewhere in between those extremes. When Ifig woke up, her wife was nowhere to be seen—not unusual, given the beautiful scenery surrounding their home. But when Ifig went outside, she saw Baud staring not at the scenery but at the bottom of her mug.
"Hey, love," asked Ifig softly. Years of hypervigilance had made Baud easy to startle, so Ifig always tried to announce her presence.
"Hm?" Baud glanced up, a dazed look on your face. "Oh, Ifig. Good morning," she said automatically.
Ifig sat down across from Baud and offered her hand across the table, which Baud accepted. "What's up?" asked Ifig, giving her wife's hand a squeeze.
"Nothing, just..." Baud shook her head. "Thinking. Just thinking."
"No!" gasped Ifig in mock horror. "Not thinking!"
Baud cracked a smile; years together had taught Ifig how to cheer her wife up, if only momentarily. "Truly awful, I know." Her smile melted back away. "Can I tell you something, love?"
"Anything."
"I'm..." Baud's grip on Ifig's hand tightened. The fingers of her free hand were drumming nervously against the table, and she was staring at her empty tea mug once again. "Please don't take this the wrong way, Ifig, but I am lonely. It's not you! I just...I'm used to working with a larger team sometimes, and having professors to manage and meetings to run. I failed to realize just how much I needed more company unti Maritte and Pertisia were here, and I think I need more of that."
"Baud, love, look at me," said Ifig, her voice serious. She waited until Baud looked up from her mug before continuing. "Thank you for telling me this. I understand completely; I don't expect or need to be your whole world, just a big part of it." She looked down at her small frame and added, "Metaphorically speaking, at least," coaxing another smile out of Baud.
The couple sat together for a moment, staring into each other's eyes, letting the small motions of Ifig's thumb on the back of Baud's hand do the talking. "You still miss them, don't you?" Ifig asked, her voice as gentle as she could make it.
As if a switch had flipped, Baud suddenly broke down in tears. "S-so m-m-much," she sobbed, and before she knew it Ifig was there next to her, pulling her into a warm embrace, her hand resting on the back of Baud's head.
"It's okay, love," Ifig whispered. "Take all the time you need to grieve. You put it off for so long, you poor thing..."
They sat there together long after Baud had cried all the tears she could spare for the moment. Later, when the sun had risen as far in the sky as it was planning to and Baud's breakfast was but a distant memory, Ifig kissed her wife's tear-stained cheeks and went to harvest some fruits and vegetables for lunch.
If only we could get more visitors, Ifig mused while she worked. But who would even be out here in weather like this?
Ifig got an answer to her question sooner than she expected. Later that evening, as she and Baud were about to settle down to sleep, a loud, insistent knocking on the door to their house got there attention.
"Helloooo? Anyone in there?" called a voice.
"I'll get this one, love," said Baud. "Maybe it's another of our former students!" The prospect of hosting company again brought a rare gleam to her eyes. Ifig found it adorable.
Baud slipped out of the room, and Ifig listened to her footsteps approaching the door. The knocking continued, unabated. "C'mon, I'm still half-frozen from the trip here! You wouldn't leave a girl to freeze, would y—" As soon as the door opened, the visitor stopped talking.
After a moment, Ifig was curious what could have happened. After a minute, she was worried. After her pulse rate spiked, she was dashing out of their bedroom to see what had happened, half-convinced that her wife had been kidnapped. She leapt out of bed and burst out of the room to find Baud standing at the front door, staring down...
Oh. That's probably not great.
Their visitor was none other than Safina Hildegaard, former Ikenfell student and number one problem child during Baud's time as headmistress.
"Ifig, we have a guest," Baud said robotically. "Can you please show her to a room? I think I shall go to sleep now." She turned around and marched back into the bedroom, shutting the door behind her.
Safina wore a sheepish grin as she turned to Ifig. "So uh...hey, Professor Everleigh. How's everything been since, uh..." She trailed off. There was something in the young witch's forced smile that Ifig thought looked pained. Though I imagine she won't want to talk about it...almost like a certain someone else I know.
At the thought of Baud, Ifig decided she would do whatever she could to help Safina. They might even be good for each other. Or tear each other apart. She smiled welcomingly. "We've been managing. But how about you? I'll fix you some tea and you can tell me all about it."
"I...No, I shouldn't, I'm sorry, if Maritte had told me you were the ones here I never would have—"
"Safina, please don't go. You're welcome here. We owe you so much for saving all our lives. I..." Ifig started to tear up, much to her surprise. "I owe you for saving my Baud." She wiped away a tear as discreetly as she could manage and regained her composure. Now is not the time. "Please. It's the least we can do."
Safina still looked skeptical, but she relented. "Fine. It's not like I can get anywhere else tonight anyway. But please, can I just get a room and go to bed now? I'm very tired, and I just want to sleep."
"We have plenty of rooms upstairs. Feel free to take your pick!" Ifig said. She pointed Safina toward the stairs, and Safina nearly sprinted over to them. "Oh, and help yourself to any food you want in the morning. We have plenty to go around."
"Thanks, Professor Everleigh!"
Ifig went to her and Baud's shared room and saw her wife already asleep in bed, or doing a convincing impression. As she climbed in next to her, she couldn't shake the feeling that the next morning was going to be awkward.
The next morning was awkward.
As usual, Ifig woke up after Baud. When she finally dragged herself out of bed, she headed directly outside, certain her wife would be there. Sure enough, Baud was sitting outside with a mug of tea, but she wasn't alone: Safina was there, too, and it looked like they were in the middle of a difficult conversation.
Safina was wringing her hands and looking anywhere but at Baud, her cheeks wet with tears. "I wasn't there, but Mar told me about what happened later, and...I'm so sorry, Ael—um, Headmistress Aeldra. I went about everything the worst way possible, and I—" Baud stood up and walked away wordlessly before Safina could continue, brushing past Ifig on her way inside.. "Yeah, I'd probably walk out on me, too," Safina mumbled to herself.
"It's not you," Ifig reassured her. "She has a lot on her mind, and years of processing to catch up on. Speaking of which, I should probably check on her. Will you be okay out here on your own?" Safina nodded. "Okay, I'll be back. Don't you dare leave as soon as I have my back turned."
Ifig went back inside and knocked on the bedroom door. "Baud, love? Can I come in?" When there was no response, she opened the door and slipped inside, closing it behind her. Baud was curled up on the bed facing away from the door, her head buried in the pillows. "Mind if I sit down and brush your hair for a while?"
Baud shrugged, which Ifig knew was the best she was going to get, so she grabbed a hair brush, sat down on the bed, and got to work. Her lovely green hair didn't really need the attention—she made sure to keep it in good condition—but she and Ifig both found it soothing, and it was the perfect way to pass the time when Baud was feeling bad.
Eventually, Baud broke the silence. "I'm sorry about that," she whispered hoarsely. "I just...couldn't sit there while that girl apologized."
"It's okay, love," Ifig replied, still brushing her wife's hair. "You don't have to forgive her right away, you know. You don't have to forgive her ever, if you don't want. I...I hope you're not upset that I let her stay the night?"
"Oh, no, Ifig, my heart, that's not...augh!" Baud pounded the bed in frustration. "Everything is coming out wrong! I wish I weren't like this! I wish I had..."
"...your room in the stacks?" Ifig completed the sentence for her. She nodded and burst back into tears, rolling over so Ifig could hold her. "Love, you know I don't blame you for anything you did, but the room and the blood magic...you know they'd only make things worse, right?"
Baud nodded. "I couldn't even look her in the eye just now, Ifig. She's just a child, but she saw the truth that was right in front of me for so long. And now she's apologizing to me for fixing my mistakes! To me, the one who ruined everything in the first place!"
"Do you want me to ask her to leave?" asked Ifig, discarding the brush to run her fingers through her wife's hair. "I understand if it's too much for you to handle right now. It's important to be gentle with yourself."
"No!" Baud pulled back and looked Ifig in the eyes, a serious expression on her tearstained face. "In fact, I know exactly what I must do. Thank you, love." She stood up, smoothed her nightgown, dried her eyes, and walked out the door toward Safina.
True to her word, Safina was still sitting outside, gazing up at the canopy with a faraway look on her face.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" asked Baud. She took a seat across from Safina.
"Hm? Oh, yeah, I guess," Safina replied absentmindedly, then did a double take when she saw that it was Baud who had joined her. "Come to kick me out yourself?" There was no accusation in her voice; only resignation.
Baud's eyes widened. "What? Of course not, chi—Safina." She took a deep breath before continuing. "I am truly sorry for the way I treated you at Ikenfell. I thought I was acting to protect Ikenfell, but...I was just protecting myself" She laughed bitterly. "And failing at that, too. If it weren't for your courage and determination..."
"No." Safina stood up. "That's bullshit. I wasn't trying to save the world or anything. I just wanted to stick it to you."
"Yes, but the sapling—"
"Shut up!" Safina shouted. "Yeah, I was digging up all those old books with Ima, but I had no idea how important the sapling was. I just knew that you had locked it away and assumed you did it...I don't even know. To spite me, I guess. Me, me, me. If the dark fold had been in there, I..." She stopped her tirade, wide-eyed. "...fuck, I probably would have done the same thing, wouldn't I?" She started crying. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, both of you."
Ifig couldn't help it: she burst out into a fit of giggles. The other two women turned to face her, bewildered. "I-I'm sorry! I just can't help it! It's like I'm watching Baud p-practice apologizing to a mirror!" She lost her composure and broke down laughing, unable to keep speaking.
The others looked at each other with identically puffy eyes. Safina smirked, which made Baud stifle a giggle, which made Safina fail to stifle a giggle, and before long they were both laughing alongside Ifig.
Safina sniffled and wiped away her tears. "I guess you're right, huh?"
"She usually is, I'm afraid," said Baud fondly.
"Well...I guess there's only one thing to do about it, then." Safina stuck her hand out to Baud. "Hi there, stranger! I'm Safina Hildegaard, but you can call me Saf."
Baud let herself smile just a little. "A pleasure to meet you, Saf. I am Baudovinia Aeldra, but you may call me Baud. And this," she said with a friendly jab to Ifig's ribs, "is my terrible gremlin of a wife, Ifig Everleigh." Ifig smiled and leaned her head on Baud's shoulder in response.
"Nice to meet you, Baud!" Safina frowned. "So, can I...not call you that, too? Is that okay?"
"Oh thank Wala you asked!" Baud said, laughing with relief. "Baudovinia or Aeldra will do nicely; just please none of this 'headmistress' nonsense. May I ask you to extend me the same courtesy?"
"I'm afraid not, Aeldra," Safina said, a grim look on her face. "You must always refer to me as Headmistress from now on." Baud let out a surprised bark of laughter. "But really, of course you can just call me whatever. Honestly, I don't think I'd be able to handle acting like best buds all of a sudden."
Baud nodded, her smile having grown despite her best efforts. "Thank you very much, Hildegaard."
"So, uh," Safina began nervously, "now that that's out of the way...can I stay here for a while? I maybe kind of don't have anywhere else to go at the moment..."
Baud looked to Ifig, but her wife just smiled and shrugged, leaving the choice to Baud. "Yes," she said decisively. "Yes, we would love to have you stay here. I would love have to have you stay here, for as long as you want."
Ifig clapped her hands. "So, it's decided! I think this calls for some celebration pancakes, don't you?" She got up and started inside, then turned around. "Safina, care to come help me out?" The younger witch hopped up eagerly and ran after her.
Baud smiled. "I did it, Ifig," she whispered triumphantly. If Safina of all people was willing to give her a second chance...well, maybe there was hope for her yet.